How To Boost Our Quest For Happiness
How Do We Secure That - Peace Of Mind?!
The Duchess of Sussex’s quest for happiness.
“The right to pursue happiness”
the American birthright to pursue happiness
The US thought pattern - me and me alone is the most important person in the world - it’s even in their “Declaration of Independence” - “the right to pursue happiness”. Can be quite bewildering for the rest of the world.
I was brought up in Sweden but I’m also 1/2 French. When I did my fashion degree course in Paris I vividly remember the frustration from the teacher when I had finished a project early and plonked my work on the side of the board so all other’s work could fit in. He was surprised and moved it to bang in the middle as they came after me – they had to take whatever place was left.
That isn’t the Swedish philosophy at all. I was brought up in the 70’s, bang in the blossoming socialism under Palme’s regime. Even if my parents were right wing the whole Establishment and Everything oozed of community and ‘you are in the bigger picture’ mentality. So this me … me – is not something that comes naturally to us brought up in Sweden in the 60-70’s.
I worked in Denmark for a while and I was struck by their ego centric focus – not at all like in Sweden- and we are so alike! And close countries. I thought.
People in the UK are shocked by The Duchess of Sussex’s quest for happiness and her demands that it’s her birthright. It is in their declaration!
"Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness" is a well-known phrase in the United States Declaration of Independence…
The Declaration says have been given to all humans by their creator, and which governments are created to protect. it’s widely referenced and seen as an inspiration for the basis of government.
So, by law she can demand the right to pursue her happiness - her family's quest for happiness- and by so using her Americain birthright - happiness for her and only for her- never mind the bigger picture.
I’m a little bit mixed in my feelings about this one.
The right to look after yourself, your own well-being – be it mental health or financially I think is honorable and the right thing to do.
But I also think there is a bigger picture. We are not a single lonely stand alone piece but we are all inter linked together in a massive subconscious energy – both in mind and body!
So if I pursue my own happiness I do hope that’s yours too.
Having said that.
When I lived up north in England I was deeply unhappy with the “surroundings” and the openly rude “friends” my husband and his family had.
Did anyone tell me that I would pay for my mother-in-laws perceived shortcomings? NOP!
And that she would punish me if I had any easier road than she had had over the years. NOP - no one told me that either!
I was thrown into all that. As all things in life – there is always some good and bad and there were also some lovely people up there, but the close ring around my husbands family was at the best – just plain weird.
Did I ever think people would treat or behave like that to me? Nooo!
If I had I would have run as fast I could from the very start!
So I don’t think she for a second foresaw the acrimonious feelings, words and attitude towards her as I sure didn’t towards me.
If I had had more of a Meghan Marvel attitude - and put my self worth first - we would have moved years ago.
If I had been able to make my husband see that it was paramount for me to leave that area and start fresh somewhere else I would have honoured me so much more.
I never did.
I just kept creeping further and further down under the duvet covers.
So who is “wrong” here?
According to an article by an English journalist, Rod Liddle in his article in the Spectator, ‘My’ truth about Meghan and Harry, 13 March 2021.
Meghan is at fault 100%. She doesn’t understand the word honour or duty or truth – as her truth doesn’t need to stand aligned with the truth of the masses – as per her upbringing in the US. She has the audacity to think of her own well being before the establishment’s and the better good of the country- the good for the masses.
My DICK is bigger than yours so I’m right! The bigger picture, the untold truths of what’s right and wrong here in the UK are the only truth and the only right way. For the old bigger good.
Is my thought from that piece. I can share that my husband didn’t read it at all like that.
Is that why some people become so popular as they appeal to the masses - beige coloured?
Greyish? Never say a wrong word or take a stand.
Never think for themselves or priorities themselves?
It’s weird as there are more eccentric people in the UK that I have ever met in my life.
In Sweden, the REAL downside of community spirit is the “JANTE LAG”- where NO one is allowed to be “The round pegs in the square holes”.
I thought England applauded that thinking of accepting “All creatures great and small”.
I didn’t move to the UK to be part of the grey masses nor NOT to have my own voice.
Thank god I’m rediscovering mine now.
I also want to take up the 14th amendment - As I have just seen Will Smith new movie on Netflix- AMEND.
It’s a fascinating TV série of stories – and he does know how to tell a good story – about the 14th Amendment.
Just to update you if you don’t know it:
“July 9, 1868, the Fourteenth Amendment granted citizenship to all persons “born or naturalized in the United States,” including formerly enslaved people, and provided all citizens with “equal protection under the laws,” extending the provisions of …”
AMEND tells of course the long story of the obvious right for slaves to have human rights, the right to feel and be treated like human beings and with the backing of the law. It takes a long time to even take seed, though. It’s a marathon not a race and the turtle 🐢 really springs to mind!
Then it talks about the right to marry in a same sex marriage.
Did you know that Bill Clinton through out the right for same sex marriage! I know it was him and nor her but that sure changed my view in both Clinton and Hillary.
Then – did you know that same sex marriage was legalised first in 2015 in the US?! Under the Obama administration- not by him! the president! But by a man and his unstoppable team. 2015!
“On June 26, 2015, the U.S. Supreme Court struck down all state bans on same-sex marriage, legalized it in all fifty states, and required states to honor out-of-state same-sex marriage licenses in the case Obergefell v. Hodges.”
I must say there are some serious issues within the US set up.
But I also applaud that each person has the fundamental right to honour their needs before anything else!
I wish my father in law would have known that! When we married and were forced- YES! to live in a crumbling MANSION with greenery growing inside, no central heating, ice on the inside of the windows, bath water turned into ice within minutes – top 40 cm deep bath! 1 bath for the family / day.. ALL to reduce the tax once we sold after 5 years. For us all to benefit from – not just for my husband and I.
The lights were a death trap – and I had to turn the lights on wearing wellies as rubber doesn’t lead electricity!
When you breathe out inside the house in the winter – the cold air created that steam that you can normally see outside on a cold winter day. Our guests came with fur coats if they had + hats – for dinners in the winter!
Looking back – it was mad and quite dorky and sometimes fun but most of the time heartbreaking and frustrating.
If I had had better sense and more umf and more self respect! I would have left there and then. But I didn’t - I bit my tongue and stayed.
I wish I had had a small bite of that American sense of entitlement- to pursue my own happiness! Regardless of what any one said, thought or did.
And left but I never did.
Then if I had left – my kids wouldn’t have gone to Eton nor to Down house and we would have moved to Stockholm.
I don’t know what that would have been like – but I do know that both kids loved their schools and the lives they are creating for themselves here in the UK.
Nothing is black or white – rather a shade of greys – like the middle of the road – grey people. Is that the secret sauce? The grey middle? To pursue your happiness in the UK? Stay within the grey spotted zone?
I must think about that one and see where I land.
I INVITE YOU TO SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT THE RIGHT TO PURSUE YOUR HAPPINESS, REGARDLESS WHERE YOU LIVE AND WHERE YOU COME FROM. LOVE TO HEAR YOUR STORY!
Week 10 day 5 out off 120 days
Loads Of Love To You Wherever You’re In The World!
Note: All information provided by Beatrice Rhodes G de V from Fab and Fit over 50 is of a general nature and is furnished only for educational/entertainment purposes only. No information is to be taken as medical or other health advice pertaining to any individual specific health or medical condition. You agree that use of this information is at your own risk and hold Beatrice Rhodes G de V from Fab and Fit over 50 harmless from any and all losses, liabilities, injuries or damages resulting from any and all claims.
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